Friday, May 1, 2009

Can We Talk About Our Habits?

I realised that most people don’t always like to talk about their habits especially teenagers. But yet, we find ourselves doing them over and over again. I always wish that when a man of God calls an altar call for prayers against those habit, that would be the end to those habits but I’ve realised that sometimes it’s just the beginning. And the bad thing about our habits is that most times there are only three people that know about it, us, God and the devil. So that makes it a bit difficult to solve. Like we all know that two heads are better than one, but that is not the case for our habits. And some times it could be just four people that may know about it, the first still remains we, and the second may be the other person that also encourages you in that habit or a partner, God then the devil. Let me tell you a true story:

A teenager walked up to me after a wonderful service on Sunday. He said he wanted to see me and talk with me, I really hadn’t noticed him in church that often but I wanted to listen to what he had to say.

He told me that he had a very bad habit which was sex. He said he found it difficult to resist sex or stop it. This is a teenager within the ages of 15 – 17. So I asked him if he had a girl friend. He said yes. I then asked him if she was the one he was sleeping with. He said no. So I was confused, then he told me it was his house girl. At first I was confused and didn’t even know what to say. So that’s why it was so difficult for him because he stayed in the same house with the girl and we all know that mummy and daddy are not always at home.

I advised him, prayed with him, and told him practical things to do and also tried to follow him up, to God be the glory he eventually stopped.

I realised that sexual lust is the major habit teenagers struggle with in this generation. Some still struggle with pornography. Even the so called movies that we watch now are filled with a lot of junk, and the way it happens is that it gradually creeps into your mind and you will gradually desire more then you will not know when you start watching porn like they call it. Some even have it on their phones. The sad part is that it’s now becoming a norm and everyone is conveniently getting involved with porn and they don’t even feel bad about it any longer. Even those guys selling CD’s comfortably display porn for you to buy.

I always tell teenagers that whatever you do now can either make you or break you. I recall a story I read about a young couple. After they got married, everything was going well until the man started asking his wife to watch pornography with him. I’m sure some teenagers will be wondering if that is wrong since they are married and they have the right to do whatever they want. Just hold on and listen to the story. The couple started watching pornography and before they knew it, the man got so addicted to it that he could not show any love to his life unless he watched porn and he always wanted to do the insane things they do. To cut the long story short, the lady started feeling some terrible things crawling inside her. I’m sure your wondering were that came from. Friends, there are a lot of things that we do that have spiritual implications that we do not know about. When you watch porn, you are indirectly feeding your spirit with junk and there are so many things going on in the spiritual.

Let me tell you a bit about myself, while I was growing up as a teenager, I had friends who were always talking about porn. Somehow, I was really curious to know what they were always talking about, as God will have it I never had the access to watch any but always wanted to watch those movies that are rated 18 because they had a little of sex scenes in it. I will be very honest with you; I struggled with that for a while until one of my HODs in church told me how he dealt with that same issue. He said he stopped watching movies for a whole year. Then I knew I had to do something. With God on my side, I was able to deal with it on time before it dealt with me. I’m sure some of us may be going through the same habit; my best advice to you is to apply the same principle and also pray about it. Like I said earlier on, your action is what matters the most.

Most times we think that when God says we shouldn’t do something, we think its just to please him, we need to ask ourselves, as a girl, who gets to be pregnant with her future destroyed, or as a guy who gets to have all kinds of venereal diseases, or a girl who gets to be broken hearted when a guy sleeps with you and abandons you, or a guy who gets to be called a father at the age 17 and or a girl who gets to be called a mummy at the age of 16. I know girls, that at some point they had aborted pregnancies all in the name of pleasing their bodies, and ever since then, they have been facing one physical problem or the other. All as a result of habits that were not dealt with at the right time.

We need to understand that all those ‘thou shall not’ is for our own good, God is always God irrespective of what you do. Your actions can never promote him or demote him, he is always God. Your living a holy life is for your own good. Your putting all your bad habits away is for your own good.

I have a friend; we entered the university at the same time. When she got to her second year, she moved to medical school which was off campus so I rarely saw her. After a couple of years, I heard she was pregnant for a guy she had been dating for a long time. Unfortunately, the guy just finished school and was waiting to go for youth service. Her parents insisted she must get married to the guy because they couldn’t take the shame of their daughter giving birth before getting married. To cut the long story short, they got married and my friend is now living in the guy’s parent’s house. I will be honest with you; my friend is going through a lot now all in the name of not being able to deal with a habit at some point. She is in her final year in school and she also has to take care of her baby. What really moved me about her story was that, something happened between her and her boyfriend who is now the father of her child. She was crying and the boy said and I quote, “You’re still crying, don’t worry, I will give you more things to cry about’’, and I said to myself, this is a guy that at some point would have promised the whole world to the girl. That shocked me.

Some teenagers have the habit of always disrespecting elders or their parents. Remember what the bible says; honour thy father and thy mother so that you may live long. I’m sure we all want to live long, so all we have to do is to always respect people that are much older that we are. It can only do you good.

Some teenagers have the habit of always listening to secular songs. This has always been a topic teenagers argue about all through my time in the teens church. But let me be honest with you, yes it is true that it’s not written in the bible but it’s not all things that are wrong that is written in the bible. God also expects us to apply wisdom to a lot of other things. When you feed your mind with secular songs that talk about love, you start desiring for love and most of the time, you end up in the wrong hands. Whenever you also listen to secular songs that use terrible words, before you know it, you also start using those kinds of words. Remember, the devil was an angel and he was built with musical instruments, so he know the importance of music and he is really using that against youths and teenagers. I saw a video of the wutang clang some years ago. The bird that signifies their gang went into the temple and cut off the head of Jesus. It was in form of a cartoon. I know that some of us still listen to their songs. I would probably talk about this and go in-depth in some other series. We really have to be careful with the kinds of songs we listen to.

Friends, whenever we exhibit good habits, we tend to give God the glory, remember what the bible says in Matt. 5:17, let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your father in heaven.

I would like you to just list those habits that you know do not please God, ask Him for mercy and look for ways or strategies of putting an end to those habits. You have to devise a means or else, you will realize you are just going back to those things and you have to be much discipline.
My prayer for us is that those things that do not glorify God in our lives, God will help us to deal with them in Jesus name. I also have areas in my life that I also want to improve on so I’m not Mr Perfect. That just shows I’m also human. But His grace is sufficient. If you need someone to talk to about a particular habit you are struggling with and you really don’t know how to deal with it, feel free to call me or send me an e-mail and be sure I will get back to you. God bless you. In case you don’t have a relationship with God, the best gift you can give yourself is to totally accept Jesus into your life and start building a relationship with him. If you want to do that, just say a simple prayer

Lord Jesus, I accept that I am a sinner, please forgive me of all my sins, I accept Jesus as my Lord and personal saviour. And thank you for sending your son to die for my sins. In Jesus name. Amen

Please look for a bible believing church and begin to study your bible and pray that God should reveal himself to you. God bless you.

Written by Wale Adenugba

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